I had the pleasure of joining Peter Okonkwe from P. English Literature on his channel recently to talk about my book, “Speaking Scripture.” One of the questions he asked was if I had faced any challenges while writing the book. I certainly had, and it was encouraging to talk through those trials my family and I faced during that time and to remember how God had seen us through.
Indeed, just before writing the book and throughout the process, we kept facing health trials that had me giving up hobbies and dreams in order to care for my family. At one point, I found myself bowing in prayer to lay down my dream of recitation ministry on the altar as well. This is a good summation of that prayer: “If it’s Your will, You can take it, but I don’t know why You would take it, Lord. I submit to You.” With less dreams and hobbies to occupy my mind, I suddenly found myself with more time to think about what God would like me to do, and that’s when I decided to write my book. I look back now and see at least one of His purposes for that journey was to prepare me to write, and I praise Him for that!
After the time of trials ended, not only was our faith stronger, but the Lord led me to continue pursuing recitation ministry. Other things I gave up, like my hobby of sewing, have been left set aside. I’ve been so grateful for the way the Lord led us through that valley and prepared us for the journey we’ve been taking today. It is so hard to fully trust Him when you’re walking in the trial and can’t see the end, but He is trustworthy.
It didn’t make sense to me that He would require my ten-year dream of recitation, something I am certain came from Him. By placing that dream in His hands again, I was also giving Him control over it. He was able to guide me into more than I had been dreaming of, leading me to write a book and helping me make it to through the writing, editing, formatting, and publishing process. He has used this book to open new doors and because of it, I’ve been able to step into the dream He gave me and recite for others to serve Him.
Right now, my family and I are going through different trials. Some of them are just big changes, not bad changes, but they are requiring us to trust Him in a special way. I can look back to the time I wrote this poem, the time when I was laying down dreams without knowing what He would do with them, and I can trust Him in this present time. He is trustworthy, and He has been gracious to earn my trust as well. And so I look to Him and say, “Where You go, I will go, and where You stay, I will stay. Your people will be my people, and You will be my God.” (Personal adaption of Ruth’s promise to Naomi in Ruth 1:16).
Refiner’s Fire
by Rachel Eernisse, 2/7/2022
Refiner’s fire
Giving up desires
Placing dreams on the altar
And wondering if they’ll burn away.
Grateful for the growing,
Thankful for the knowing
That God will use this trial
In His way.
Grateful in the testing,
Trusting hidden blessing,
But recognizing I still need to grieve.
Letting go and learning
It won’t fully take the yearning
For the dreams and little things I’ve released.
Hurting heart is healing,
God continues teaching.
The shining gold remains within my faith.
I trust Him in this journey,
Watching pieces burning,
He proves His tenderness and grace.